I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
