Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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