she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I just googled if crying burns calories
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
