gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
