New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize