don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
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