Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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