we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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