he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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