so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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