Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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