this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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