All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I had to cum in my sink.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
