he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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