Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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