we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i barfeds in our rink
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
my being single is dangerous.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
