Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
