I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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