he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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