I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
