Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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