I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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