There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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