i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
