her vagine was all disorganized.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize