She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I cut my penus on the lid.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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