worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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