This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
its liver damage thursday
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
