i barfeds in our rink
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
there is puke in my bra ... again
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
