so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Randomize
