The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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