They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
