wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
