Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
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