Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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