went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
