How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Randomize
