I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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