there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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