well I can't set my house on fire every night
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I just googled if crying burns calories
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
