I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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