He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
