You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
