Slut skills are useful in every country.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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