I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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