i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
