I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
