If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize