I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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