I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Randomize
