I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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